Battleship

[cousinshelley]

In progress

DNWs (Do Not Wants):

• Major character death, noncon, underage
• Anything related to COVID19 or politics
• Unrequested 1st-person POV except epistolary, 2nd-person POV that involves romance or sex, readerfic
• AUs (setting, omegaverse, genderswap, etc.), including speculative elements like ghosts or sex pollen in non-speculative canons (canon divergence is fine)
• Non-canon disabling or fatal illness or injury, self-harm, suicide
• Bleak, hopeless endings
• Original character or unrequested character POV, script format, unrequested dialogue-only, lapslock (but lowercase titles are fine)
• Unrequested gender, asexuality and neurodivergence headcanons
• Cruelty to animals or animal death
• Unrequested infidelity and friend/partner betrayal
• Focus on Thanksgiving/Christmas holidays, unrequested crossovers, crack fic
• Focus on weddings/marriage/getting married (characters can be married, but don't make marriage a plot point), kidfic, pregnancy or birth of any kind, including eggs
• BDSM, D/s and/or consent negotiations, sex toys, sexting, mommy/daddy kink
• Generic dirty talk, porn film dialogue during/about sex, calling someone slut, whore or other names
• Sexual pain and torture, hitting, suffocating, dehumanization, humiliation including bad sex, ruined orgasms and mentions of a small or flaccid penis, age-regression/age play
• Vomiting, coughing up anything, flatulence, body secretions or wastes (except sweat and blood), spitting, and come play. (Come is fine, even a brief description, but please don’t focus on it.)
• Unrequested sex-related tags and tags with "play" or "kink" in them that aren't covered above

Our Flag Means Death

• Izzy Hands/Evelyn Higgins

Fandom-specific DNW: References to or foreshadowing of Izzy's death.

I adore Evelyn and think she and Izzy would be fire together.

I don't care how you get them in the same place at the same time. You can set it long before the show or in some canon divergence during/after or hand-wave it away. It can be before or after Izzy's unicorn leg, I don't care. I just think an enemies-to-lovers story would be great with them disliking each other immediately and intensely and that turning into something hot, though I'd be happy with anything, whether it never gets beyond banter and flirting or evolves into more.

She would give zero fucks what he thinks, and I love that, and I think he eventually would too. Her being much taller than him also floats my boat, especially if he's comfortable with it or even enjoys it. (No short-man syndrome here, please.)

It would be nice to see Evelyn treated like a lady (or however she wants to be treated!) and for someone who feels something for Izzy to treat him like they care, even if they argue much of the time.

I'm okay with Izzy dealing with his pining for Ed a little bit, at least in the beginning, so there's no need to pretend that wasn't a thing (unless you want to, then it's fine). But if you do bring it up, please don't do much more that mention it or use it to compare to how he feels about Evelyn at the time to show that the current goings-on are much more positive or that he likes how he feels better, etc.

It doesn't have to have a happily ever after, but let it be a happy for now and maybe more later kind of thing, at least. Basically, even if he leaves at the end in an "until next time" scenario (which would be fine!), I wouldn't want him to have had great fun with Evelyn and then go back to pining for Ed.

A few prompts:

Ed disappeared in search of Stede at the end of S1 instead of breaking bad, so Izzy goes in search of him in Stede's town and meets Evelyn, or they run into each other at any point, even canon-divergent post-canon or pre-Stede, for some reason.

Izzy meets her because he's been tasked with kidnapping or killing her as some kind of old debt or favor. She's clearly been up to some shit and maybe has enemies. He ends up admiring her and turns on the person who wanted her dead. Protective Izzy is a good thing.

Izzy teaches her some sword moves to help her protect herself or just for fun. I also love the idea of them committing murder or otherwise getting up to mischief together. Murder as bonding! Maybe someone's threatening Evelyn and they take care of the problem.

Izzy is touch-starved and Evelyn fixes that for him. And/or he talks about Ed and she makes it pretty clear she knows he's got it bad but shows him that there are other options out there.

Izzy is hurt and Evelyn takes care of him. Good old hurt/comfort can never go wrong. Hurt Evelyn with Izzy as caretaker works for me too.

I'm all in for something where there's hand kissing, finger sucking, bandaging a hand, stroking a hand as things that really move and/or excite one or preferably both of them. (Fingerfucking is fine to include, I just didn't pick the tag because I don't want nothing but that.)

Izzy kneeling for almost any reason, including removing/putting on her clothing/shoes or to perform oral sex would also be a treat. Izzy kneeling and hand/finger kissing/sucking would lay me out.

A regular old meet-cute, maybe they're out drinking, dining, dancing, whatever, where they get to know each other and realize they're both rascally bastards, would be great too.

I just think a story with these two at the center would be amazing. Let them lose control with each other or never even get to a kiss as long as there's obvious sexual tension and attraction there. It'll be fun no matter what.